Today at about 3pm my chest started hurting. It was a stabbing pain that made it hard for me to breath and was located over my heart. At first I figured it was an air bubble or something that would work itself out. However, as the day went on the pain got worse and would occasionally shoot down my arm and make me feel faint. By 6pm I could hardly walk with out feeling like I was going to throw up because my chest hurt so much.
That is when I came to a scary realization. Yes, I may be too young to have a heart attack but I am diffidently out of shape enough to have one. I hoped that was not what was going on but to be safe my step mom loaded me up in the car and took me to the E.R. After an EKG and X-ray they ruled out heart attack but when they did the blood work they found clues suggesting that I may have a blood clot. Thankfully, a catscan ruled that out. They still don’t know what is causing my pain but since they ruled out the two scary possibilities it was safe to send me home. They think that I might have pulled one of the four muscle walls of my chest cavity and ordered me to take it really easy and give my body time to repair itself. The pain hasn’t gotten any better but at least I don’t have to worry about it being anything serious.
All of that just to say, it really opened my eyes to how unhealthy I am. I was determined to lose weight before but now I have to. The thought that I am overweight enough to be unable to rule out a heart attack as a possibility for why I would have chest pain was scary! I want to be around for a looooong time. I am way to young to be concerned with clogged arteries. Now I know that I may very well be over reacting and that it is possible that all my arteries are just fine but I don’t want to risk it. Something like that shouldn’t even be on my radar.
God, please help me to find the right way for my body to lose weight and stay healthy. I have tried so many diets and plans and workouts and they have only worked for a short time only to leave me back where I started or even in some cases worse off. I want the body you made for me. Not this one that I have made for myself. I want to be whole and healthy and vibrant. Please, help me to be healthy again.